Four ways I hope they don’t f*ck up the next Robocop movie.

Robocop is a franchise that had one amazing movie. The original is a classic. Robocop 2 & Robocop 3 are memorable for all the wrong reasons, & the 2014 reboot didn’t exactly set the world on fire either. Now that a new film is moving forward (source) with director Neil Blomkamp (District 9) attached. Let’s hope they get this one right. Below are some elements from the previous films that I hope they avoid this time.

Annoying children

hobb

Looks like a prepster. He going to the country club later?

Remember Hob from Robocop 2? He was that annoying kid who took over the Nuke Cult. (more on that in few). Not sure why they decided to have this character. He isn’t scary. If you take away his guns, he’s just scrawny little preteen. It becomes even more laughable that he takes over the Detroit drug trade. Nikko in Robocop 3 is almost just as ridiculous. Her character is a master hacker with the push of a button.

Made up drug cults

Robocop 2 strikes again. What the hell kind of name is “Nuke” anyway.  Is it like a nuclear explosion for your brain? Why couldn’t it just be a a drug that already exists? Also, someone like Kane would never be the leader. He gets high on his own supply. This makes him just a radical hippie with a gun. That’s never a bad-ass villain in my eyes. If that wasn’t bad enough, it gets even more lame. Once Kane “dies,” he is replaced by Hob. Yes, a preteen takes over the Detroit drug trade.

ninja

Wasn’t as cool as this looks.

Make good ideas actually work! Almost everything about Robocop 3 sucked

I say “almost” because the movie does have some cool concepts. However, it manages to completely fuck them all up. Doesn’t the thought of seeing Robocop fight a ninja robot sound cool? Hell ya! It certainly does!.. Well, it wasn’t! It was the furthest thing from cool. It was more lame than your parents chaperoning your middle school dance. Wouldn’t it be cool to see Robocop using a kick ass jetpack? Hell ya! It certainly would!…Well, it wasn’t! It looked like ass, & all he did was blow up a single tank. He then hovers in midair for a second and shoots a couple bad guys. That’s it! I guess they didn’t have a lot of money left in the budget. That scene is hilariously bad.

Toning down the violence for a PG-13 rating

Robocop 3 was toned down & lame. The 2014 reboot was also a far cry from the tone of the original.  I remember seeing the original when I was about six years old. My parents didn’t realize the level of violence that was to come. It certainly had a lasting effect on me. Several years later when That 70’s Show debuted, I practically had a PTSD moment when I saw Kurtwood Smith. To me, he wasn’t Red Forman. That was Clarence Boddicker! My point is, the R rating was used in a way that really developed these characters, & made you feel like Robocop legitimately had someone to fear. If you’re creating a story about the tragic death of a cop, you need tragedy and violence. If Murphy wasn’t brutally killed, it wouldn’t feel as sweet once he returned as Robocop and killed Clarence. This is a franchise that needs to take a page from Deadpool  & The Punisher. Brutal violence needs to be part of the story.

I have read reports that this film will be R rated. However, I’ll believe it when I see it. With this being so early in development, that gives the studio plenty of time to screw this up. Hopefully, that won’t be the case though. My fingers are crossed. I hope they get this film right.

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