Armless man arrested for stabbing tourist.

After allegedly stabbing a tourist from Chicago, an armless Miami street artist has his hands full (I couldn’t resist that joke).

“Jonathan Crenshaw, 46, uses his feet to paint and allegedly used his feet again to stab tourist Cesar Coronado, 22, after midnight on Tuesday, the newspaper reports. Miami Beach Police allege the artist clutched a pair of scissors in his feet and stabbed the visitor twice, according to the Herald.” (source People)

Ok, wow. I’m not sure where to begin. With no arms, obviously this guy has adapted to use his feet in ways that we wouldn’t, but how did Coronado manage to get stabbed twice? I would think he could have easily fled to safety after the first stab.

Aside from being armless, Crenshaw is also homeless. He’s also had previous arrests involving “trespassing, disorderly intoxication and battering police, among other things.” He is playing the self defense card & claims Coronado randomly punched him in the head while he was lying down. Coronado’s friend was with him. She claims he was only asking for directions.

While Crenshaw deserves the charge of aggravated battery with a weapon, I don’t think Coronado is exactly the brightest bulb in the circuit either. Nobody has the right to attack you, but sometimes people will put themselves in a position where that’s more likely to happen. Let’s say I’m lost in a city, if I see a group of thugs dressed in red, I’m NOT asking them for directions. Sure, maybe nothing would happen to me, but the odds certainly increase. It’s called being street smart. In this case, he asks a stranger with no arms for directions. Did he expect him to use his feet to point? Dude, you don’t have a cellphone? You couldn’t ask anyone else? You couldn’t find a late night convenient store?  He’s also walking around after midnight. This increases the odds of dealing with a drunk dipshit. Lastly, this is in FLORIDA! That’s the icing on the cake, & significantly boosts all odds against you x2.

no arm

No arms? No Problem!

Luckily, Coronado only suffered wounds on his arm and was treated at a local hospital. I’m surprised they didn’t suggest amputation. Florida healthcare is just as much of a mess as the people living there.

If you want to look on the bright side, at least Coronado has a great conversation piece.

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