Dumb laws that are no longer enforced. This weeks state is Washington.

It’s been a while since I wrote about dumb laws. These are laws that while still technically on the books, aren’t enforced. Today we take a look at some dumb laws in the state of Washington.

How do you try on shoes? It isn’t rocket science, right? Insert foot into shoe, make sure heel stays secure in shoe, make sure toes have enough room. Am I missing something? I’m assuming an x-ray technician got drunk and did something stupid at some point because you are prohibited from using x-rays to fit shoes. Not sure why anybody would.

It seems like Washington really believes in honesty. They even expect a “heads up” from soon to be criminals from other towns. It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town. Wouldn’t that make life so much easier for the police? “Hey Chief! My name is Mike Smith. I live in Lynden. I’ll be arriving in your town shortly. I plan on killing Steve Miller who lives at 45 Main St. Just wanted to give you a heads up.”

cop

So you plan on killing Steve around noon? Ok, I’ll dispatch some units around 11:30 to intercept you. Thanks for the heads up Mike.

While honestly seems like a big deal. Lawmakers make having fun a challenge. In Lynden Washington, dancing & drinking may not occur at the same establishment. How do you expect me to get on the dance floor then!? Also, you might be disappointed to discover that strippers in Spokane County may not come closer than four feet to any customer. Does someone else walk the money over to her?

Ladies, be careful on trains or buses. If it gets overcrowded, you might need to sit on someone’s lap. That’s perfectly fine. Make sure you brought a pillow though. Women who sit on men’s laps on busses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six month jail term. That’s right. You could trigger the guy to have a boner. How dare you!

bigfoot

Then he called me hairy and smelly. I’d like to press charges.

If you’re a Bigfoot / Sasquatch sympathizer, Washington is the state for you. “The harassing of Bigfoot, Sasquatch or other undiscovered subspecies is a felony punishable by a fine and/or imprisonment”.

I guess driving a motor vehicle needs to always be a two person system. All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle. This would certainly create more jobs in the country. Apply now for a “motor vehicle escort supervisor” position. I just hope they have good health insurance because a lot of people would be getting hit. (source)

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