KISS Selling Official Air Guitar Strings for $3.99.

When I think of the band KISS, I no longer think of music. I think of all the shitty stupid merchandise they have put their name on over the years. From KISS Cologne to KISS coffins, they are truly the worst. Just when I thought they were out of ideas, this comes along. We now have air guitar strings!

I’m %100 not joking. I thought this was some weird gag, but it’s true. I checked several sources because I just couldn’t believe this. (source) Do they actually think so high and mighty of themselves that they believe they can sell you air? If I was a KISS fan I would find this insulting.

I guess you could partially blame the fan base. While we all know Gene Simmons would love to charge you a nickel for looking in his general direction, this stupid merchandise wouldn’t be possible if fans weren’t buying their shitty products to begin with.

airguitar

Is your air guitar not sounding the way you want it? For $3.99 KISS has what you’re looking for!

Just to play devils advocate, I’m trying to justify a single reason to buy this… The cardboard photo with the fire behind them is kinda cool? I don’t f*#king know! I would love to know a real reason why anybody would purchase this. Someone? Anyone?

Furthermore, if I walked out of a store that sold these and started playing air guitar, would I get accused of stealing? “Hey man, where did you get those air guitar strings? You weren’t doing that a moment ago”.  “Umm, I found an open package in the store & took them”. Then what happens?

All bands slap their names on merchandise. I get it, but KISS really has taken this too far. I can only wonder what will be next.

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-Adam Mallett

 

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